As we stood in the security line to begin the first of our 4 airplane trips this past Christmas season, my husband realized, to his chagrin, that he had forgotten to remove the little Swiss Army knife from his keychain. It was a nice and useful knife with about three blades, scissors, and the like, and had been a gift from me. We both felt sad about having to surrender it to a TSA official.
My husband decided he wasn't surrendering his knife without at least an attempt to get it past TSA. So he surrepticiously opened our roll-on and slipped his entire keychain in, just before we got to the guy checking our ID's. I didn't have much hope for it.
Sure enough, as I helped both our children get their shoes back on (because even my one-year-old was required to remove her little slip-ons) after the chaos of getting both of them and all of our assorted hand luggage through security, I saw a TSA official wave my husband over to the bag-search area. With the manner of somebody who knew exactly what he was looking for, the TSA guy opened the luggage, rummaged through, and triumphantly pulled out our Nalgene bottle, which had about an inch of water sloshing around in it. He made my husband pour out the water (he wouldn't even allow him to drink it), handed back the Nalgene, and sent us on our way with the knife still in our possession. I looked around at the thousands of other holiday travelers in the airport and wondered how many more knives were hiding in their carry-ons.
But at least we could rest assured that there was no dangerous water coming on board with us that originated outside of the "sterile area"!
Note to any TSA staff, air marshals, or other law enforcement officials who might happen to read this post: It is fictional and cannot be used against us in a court of law. My husband would never really try to smuggle a knife past airline security.
Note to anybody else reading this post: It really happened.
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