All about the Banana

When the Papaya was a baby, every week seemed like a month. Every milestone was researched, anticipated, encouraged, and duly noted - if not on paper, at least in our conversation and in our mental log of "The Papaya's Development". With our sweet Banana, however, time just slips away.

We realized with somewhat of a jolt this week that our sweet baby is all of 6 months old. 6 months - that's half a year! How did that happen? What should a 6 month old be doing? Is she doing it? Shouldn't she be starting solids now? She should definitely be rolling over by now! Daddy's medical references say not rolling over by 6 months raises "red flags". What's wrong with her? Have we been remiss? Should we have encouraged "tummy time" more?

Our "awakening" is a mixed blessing. On the one hand, it means that the Banana's now getting more personalized, developmentally appropriate attention from both her parents - no more just carrying her around in the Baby Bjorn for half the day and leaving her on her back under her butterfly to happily play with her hanging toys while we focus on other things. On the other hand, somehow the bulk of our non-essential interactions with her have suddenly become achievement oriented - we're feeling pressure to get her "up to snuff" with other average 6-month-olds. Those guilt-free moments of just gazing at her, babbling nonsense with her, and enjoying her beautiful smile and sweet disposition are much fewer. "Mommy guilt" is strong these days, sometimes because it feels like we didn't pay enough attention to helping her through appropriate developmental steps these past few months, and at other times, because it's too important to us now and we're not accepting her own pace. It's hard to know where to find the balance.

The truth is that it's only her gross motor skills (rolling over, pushing herself up when she's on her tummy) that are "delayed". She can almost sit up by herself, and loves to stand when you hold her at her hips. She's actually great with her hands and is pretty socially interactive. She's way ahead of the curve when it comes to stranger anxiety, which is sad because so many nice people come up to greet her with beautiful smiles and coos, only to get cried at. If she knows you, though, you are often rewarded by what seems to be the biggest smile in the whole wide world. The Banana loves music and singing and even has a few favorite songs. Luckily, she's not a discerning listener, because she seems to love my singing!

A couple days ago, I was playing with the Banana on the bed (trying to get her to turn over, of course) , when her father walked in. She looked right at him, smiled, and said "Da da da da"! When he walked over to pick her up, she did the same thing. Coincidence? We'll see!

The Banana is extremely picky about her breastfeeding. For one thing, my nipples are the only thing she will suck. She refuses all pacifiers, bottles, and substitute nipples. (My sister and I tried trading our babies for breastfeeding, and although my infant niece seemed to have no problem with my milk or delivery equipment, the Banana swiftly rejected my sister's offers.) The Banana is even picky about when she will deign to suck on my nipples. She prefers to do it in a completely private, quiet setting, preferably lying down, with my complete attention and no distractions. This does not happen often in a busy day, especially when we are traveling, so she will consent to be nursed sitting up. But if anybody around talks too loudly, or if there is any commotion at all, she will pull off with protests and refuse to nurse again for awhile. And woe to me if I make the mistake of making any noise at all while she is nursing - loud shrieks and a brief (5 minutes or so) nursing strike ensue. Nursing should be all about her, thank you very much! Needless to say, she is difficult, and often impossible, to nurse in public.

The Banana's shrieks, by the way, are notable in and of themselves. She hits notes with a range and power that might command respect from an operatic soprano. She will literally make your ears ring. I changed her in a public bathroom once while she was unhappy, and I fear she may have caused short term hearing loss for the other unlucky occupants (most of whom stopped on their hurried way out to point out to me - in between shrieks - what good lungs my baby had.)

And of course (since this entry is all about the Banana at 6 months), I should mention that she is beautiful! (Despite the bald and faintly flat spot on the back of her head from spending so much time on her back.) I love looking at her as she sleeps - so delicate, graceful, feminine her features are! Big blue eyes, slowly turning hazel. Very round cheeks and face. The enormous, generous smile that just seems to gather up all the happiness in the world and pass it on to the lucky recipient. The innocence and ingenuousness in her face (even when she's shrieking). May God help us to pay appropriate, focused attention to her at this stage in her development, while still celebrating all that she is right now.